Happy Sunday all, and to my Christian brothers and sisters hope you all had a wonderful time in
Church today. How has the weekend been too, am sure a lot of us are not really looking forward to the week ahead. For me I just wish everyday was Saturday. I will really want you all to excuse my language in this post because I am about to get real here (bear in mind this is a sensitive topic thankfully we are all adults). Infact I am sure I'll have to add another sequence to this post.
So here we go, talking about the most dreaded topic between parents and kids...but is it still a delicate topic really? Or are we just trying to avoid the topic because our parents avoided it with us? Research shows that teens are more sexually active than parents think. By the time they are 19, seven out of ten teens have had sex. In 2013 the National Popularion Commission (NPC) has disclosed that about 44.5 million young people between the ages of 10-24 got pregnant in 2006 and might increase to over 60 million in the coming year, wow! So you see why we need to do our part by educating our children as early as possible? Parents can really make a difference, we can talk with our kids, build a strong relationship with them and set clear expectations and boundaries for them. These are proven ways we can help prevent teenage pregnancy, reduce the chances of contracting STDs, encourage a "no sex till marriage policy" and help ensure they lead a healthy and rewarding lives. So let's get talking.
How can I start talking about sexuality to my children? Everyday life provides us the opportunity to open up on sex, start a conversation with either a Tv show where a couple are kissing, a young person going through puberty or going on a date, running into a pregnant neighbour etc. You can use different avenues to initiate a conversation but remember to be calm and relaxed keep it simple and uncomplicated, especially for the young ones so we don't get them confused. Make sure you call each organ by its name and not pee pee or thingy etc (phew!...this is hard...lol). This will lessen any sense that sexual topics are off limits and embarrassing. You need to encourage your child's interest yet be ready to stop when he no longer show interest in what you are saying.
When should I start talking to my kids about sexuality? Some of us plan the talk for months expecting to say every thing at a go and when it does not go as we planned we swear never to go down that discussion again. Talking to children about sex is a lifelong conversation, so taking it in strides is the best way to reach out to them. It is therefore important to keep our conversation age appropriate for example by age 3 or 4 children begin to feel gender identification; boys don't want to be mistaken for girls nor girls for boys.
A preschooler starts to ask where he or she is from and as a toddler you can't go into too many details so as not to confuse him or her. Some may be very curious and some may be satisfied with an answer like you were made in Mummy's tommy. Always answer your child's question as long as he/she shows interest no matter what kind of question your toddler asks and because you never know what kind of question can pop up.
To be continued......
Well i had that conversation with my daughter and she looked uninterested. I felt a little embarrassed but satisfied at the same time. Kids have a higher ability to recall memories than adults do so am sure our discussion is in her head somewhere and she would pull it out when time permits.
ReplyDeleteSometimes ago I initiated this conversations with my son and he said something that surprised me, he said a friend of his told him he caught another little boy and a girl of their age in a sexual act. He took soo long to get my son to open up. In fact my son said ever since he heard that story it has remained in his memory. And I'm talking about a six year old boy. So I had to talk him out of it and told him what the boy told him he saw was bad and punishable.
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